Tuesday 14 April 2015

Talking to my Inner Critic - Part of my SheStory



I'm currently part of a writing group called SHE Stories mentored by the lovely Lisa Lister from The Sassy She. It’s an arse kicking 28 day cycle of getting our book out of our head and into an actual hold in your hand book. I'm a struggling author....with a horrendous self-critic! I have oodles of fab ideas for writing, blogs, posts, articles and my book.....BUT....my self-critic is a dick! 

Now as part of the SHE Story course we have to talk to our self-critic....the nitty gritty business.....I've journaled with this for a couple of days now....but have decided to post it here. Now please don't take this blog as me looking for support or looking for 'bigging up', because it’s not. It’s a journey I can only do on my own if I want to write in any decent way....but I think to tackle my self-critic and take it head on....I need to put it here! So here goes........


My self-critic is snappy and quick, like a Jack Russell snarling through a fence. She jibes and digs, a pointing finger jabbing at my shoulder. When I think about writing she tells me I'm no good, that I'm not academic enough to write on any professional level. She says my grammar and spelling are rubbish! She makes me procrastinate the what if's. She tells me that nobody wants to hear what I’ve got to say and I can’t back it up either….so therefore I’m just airy-fairy.


She tells me I should get a ‘proper job’ or that rather than sitting writing or making my Magical Malas I should be cleaning the house. I’m not contributing enough to my family by doing what I’m doing self-employed. She tells me I’m disorganised and that I don’t use my time effectively.

BUT HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT SELF-CRITIC???


I AM good enough!!!!

I might not have a degree, but I do have lessons to share. So I didn’t go to university, but I spent years at college, I improved my grades. I studied and trained to become a forest school teacher. I’m running a home, raising kids and doing my damndest to do it as best as I can!

I worked a shitty job that I hated and made me miserable for 11 years. That is no longer holding me back! I have the chance to do what I love, to chase my dreams and leap after the life I want!

Accepted, I may not be a Stepford Wife house proud type, but I cook wholesome fresh food,  I keep my kitchen and bathroom clean, so what’s the problem?  Just don’t look at my dust or judge me over my unmade bed. And whilst we're at it…..I don’t iron! Life too short for that shit!

So there you have it self-critic! I’m gonna write this bloody book if it’s the last thing I do! And you and me missy are gonna live with it ok??? And as regards to grammar, spelling and layout…..that’s what my editor is for yes??? 

3 comments:

  1. Too right! I will look forward to holding your book in my hands and saying, "Oooh, I know her!!" Keep at it, brave antlered woman x

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  2. Bless you Jacqui and Thanks xx

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  3. Bless you Jacqui and Thanks xx

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